Raise your hand if you’ve tried leaning on affirmations with little to no avail. This is me…I am raising my hand. I have seen affirmations everywhere. I especially can’t hide from them when I am doom scrolling on Instagram. I have written positive words to recite many times, but for some reason, they have never stuck or made what seemed like any difference. For me, it is hard to believe what I just don’t fully believe. So how is saying something over and over really supposed to help? This is something I have often questioned, though desperation (and a little faith) kept me from being too cynical to not keep trying them. Still, I did not know how or why they work, preventing the magic from taking place. The scientific part of my brain just needed to know. Well, affirmations do work—and the magic is in your brain.
Here’s the clarity I stumbled upon while reading Confidence by Roxie Nafousi.
By definition, an affirmation is a positive statement used to combat negative self-talk and build self esteem. Not actually magic, they work through repetition, attention, and meaning.
Studies have revealed that practicing affirmations actually shows activation of the brain’s reward centers on MRIs.
You’ve probably seen examples like: I am enough, I am worthy of love and respect, or I believe in my talents and abilities. “I am” statements place you as already possessing the thing you desire. This signals to the brain that the desired state is already true. Now, this is the part that I have always had a hard time getting past. “But I know that’s not true yet,” I’d always echo to myself. I just could not get past it. Not until I came across the affirmations portion of the book I was reading, Confidence.
In Confidence, Nafousi states that the key to affirmations is in the understanding that the brain does not automatically differentiate what’s true and what’s not true. Actually, the more we hear something, the more inclined our brain is to believe it’s true—whether it is or not. It’s neuroscience, y’all. Something called neuroplasticity. Neural connections are formed through repetition and patterns. That’s why the more familiar a thought is, the more believable.
This is when it clicked. I told myself, I don’t have to believe it—my brain will (that is if I just don’t overthink the process). So, I set out to make new affirmations! I started with three. I have been told that the brain does powerful things in threes (plus they were easier to remember that way). Two of Nafousi’s tips really stood out to me and have been making my practice a lot easier this time:
- Repeat affirmations in the morning: In Step 1 of Confidence, she explains that just after waking, the brain is in a theta brainwave state. This is a semi-drowsy and relaxed state that makes you more receptive to your thoughts. I put a posted note right by my bed, so I can read it as a roll over to look out the window.
- Incorporate Affirmations with daily routines: Later, I repeat my affirmations while making my bed. This is something I aim to do each morning as I start my day. By combining the practice of affirmations with this, I have a constant reminder to hold me accountable and it doesn’t feel like an extra thing I have to do in the morning.
Learning these tips has helped me take conscious thinking out of it. And I hope they help you. By knowing what the brain is actually doing during the process, I have been able to give in to the practice more than ever. It’s only been a week, but I have kept up with it for the whole week. That’s already a HUGE improvement. I am no longer questioning my affirmations. I let them flow through my mind as if they belong there—because they do.
SLFSHLY 